The emotional experience

xoxo

When you think about it, there is really nothing whatsoever to be upset, mad, depressed or angry about. Nothing. Not a thing - ever!

(pause)

What was your immediate response to that statement? Did you nod your head in agreement and delight in the sheer joy of it? Or did you immediately search the files of your mind for rebuttals? Did you find yourself mentally reaching for thoughts of situations that warrant being angry, sad, depressed etc??

Aaaaah!!! See what you’re doing there? :)

Now don't get me wrong, I am not against negative feelings. I happen to think all emotions are useful and necessary and even healthy. We are marvelous beings - able to experience a rich variety of emotions triggered by an unlimited number of different events. Feeling is a good thing; even feeling negative emotions. There is a difference however, between experiencing an emotion and letting it overwhelm you.

We are marvelous beings! We are remarkable, incredible, wondrous creations because we control our own emotions!

Yes, you see? We have complete and total control over what we feel. Some of you are shaking your head or rolling your eyes and thinking “oh here she goes with her fluffy nonsense”. If that is what you are thinking then my friend, feel free to move along. If you are thinking that experiencing misery is completely out of your control and I’m just spouting nonsensical ramblings…then you are free to pass this by. But let me ask you this – hows that workin out for ya?

Here’s the thing folks. It’s YOU. It’s all you!

Now, I’m not saying you have to immediately try to squelch a feeling of sadness or anger the second it comes to you. By all means we should experience it. The ability to experience emotions is a fantastic ability very unique to human beings… it is indeed a wonderful thing. The key is to experience the emotion. Take life for what it is – an experience.

When the feeling wells up inside you – take a few seconds to stop and think – what is this going on? I am experiencing this emotion, or is it overtaking me? Sadness, grief, anger, any negative emotion does not have to overwhelm you or control you. It’s a very simple matter of reminding yourself that you are simply experiencing something. Allow it. Allow yourself to experience all the complex physical sensations that anger, sadness, grief manifests inside you. Feel it, explore it, consider your magnificent and grand human ability to have these responses to invisible stimuli. Let it flow through you like water – and then, like water flowing, let it go….

Release the negative emotion. Do not hold on to it, do not grab hold of it and force it to live inside you and become you. For if it lingers too long, it will certainly alter your perspective and absolutely change your experience in this world. Perspective is everything, and perspective is absolutely determined by what you are feeling. So it is important to allow negative emotions to pass through you, and it is crucially important for you to see it for what it is – an experience.

Sometimes we cling to these feelings. Like explained above, we search for rebuttles to the feeling better - we find reasons why we can't and we adhese ourselves to it. We sometimes become so accustomed to feeling crappy, that we are afraid to let go of it. It becomes familiar, and on some level - strange as it may seem - we find safety in feeling terrible. But folks, this is not healthy and you know this. You know it.

See it for what it is. The anger is not you. The sadness is not you. The desperation, greif, melancholy...is not who you are. They are just emotions that you are experiencing, that's all they are. They do not mold you. YOU mold you. Like running your fingers along a surface and experiencing the sensation of that surface, you can move on from it and change the sensation. Feeling sand paper is often not pleasing - we don't enjoy the sandpaper itself, but we enjoy our ability to feel it. We don't enjoy anger, but we can indeed appreciate our ability to feel it. And like fingers on sand paper, we can feel it, then move along.

The same can be said for positive emotions. They are experiences. The difference is they feel good! So these are the ones you’ll want to hold on to.

If you’ve read this far, you agree on some level with what I’m saying here. If not… if you find yourself sitting there thinking “I can’t help it! My life is miserable and it’s not my fault! What can I do? Everything just sucks and that is that!” Then there is really nothing I can do to change your experience for you my friend. There is no reason to feel this way, no excuse but whatever you make up in your own head to try and grip onto whatever comfort your falsely giving yourself in this familiar feeling. You can change that. Only you can change that. So, will you?

Choose to experience joy! Smile!

Be well...

xoxo